Some will say you are not guving things a chance. I have heard that before and ended up wanting to go back home to the Netherlands for well over 6 years despite of that. This time it was different. I came back and was very quickly very sure that this was not what I wanted for my myself and my family. It was a pity since the job at IRS would have meant being able to work with some of the best in the field.
But here I was at a terrible dilemma. What to do if the company you work for is everything you could ever want but at the same time the country it is situated in, in this case my country of origin is no longer having an appeal?
Sure I could probably get used to the hurried lifestyle of the average Dutchman, sure I could get used to living in an overcrowded country but the key question became “did I want to get used to this? I came to the conclusion that I did not and acted upon that.
I will get into more detail in following posts bit for now I guess this summarizes the current position.
Wasn’t that a big waste of time and money?
In the past days I have been asked this question a number of times. My answer is most definitely that this was one of the best investments I could have made: finally I came to terms with the fact that New Zealand is my home.
Here I have been living in New Zealand not being able to fully appreciate it because I was so busy thinking about getting away from here. If anything I learned that in the past years I have changed and became more appreciative of many things Kiwi than I was aware of. At the same time the mind has been playing tricks on me by remembering the nice parts about living and working in the Netherlands and forgetting about the price that comes with it especially when it comes to family life.
In short: The Netherlands have changed and I have changed and I guess we are no longer compatible.
EXPEDITION NETHERLANDS ABORTED: PEACE AT LAST
Instead of wasting any further time, Expedition Netherlands was aborted, and I returned to New Zealand. For the first time with a feeling of coming home. Fior the first time in well over six years I am at peace with the idea that this is where I belong now. What a great feeling.